A Great Reckoning by Louise Penny (CIAG 12, WM Québécois detective) . Up way too late but I needed to finish it and then cry myself out. Ooof (CWs: murder, manipulation, suicide, coercion, abuse, racism, sex work, drug use, police abuse).
In this installment Gamache continues to reckon with his the varied consequences of his choices, and the corruption that he uncovered in the Surete, by accepting the lead position in the Surete Academy, to uncover what damage is being done to the cadets there, feeding the corrupt system in the police force and part of the rot not yet rooted out. He is ambitious, confident and brave but through it all Gamache is confronted by one of his favorite proverbs "Don't believe everything you think" at every turn, and the cost of him believing a little too much in his ability to fix things. When near the end of the novel Gamache restates his core believes, it totally earned.
"We are all of us marred and scarred and imperfect. We make mistakes. We do things we deeply regret. We are tempted and sometimes we give in to that temptation. Not because we’re bad or weak, but because we’re human. We are a crowd of faults. But know this.”..
“There is always a road back. If we have the courage to look for it, and take it. I’m sorry. I was wrong. I don’t know.” He paused again. “I need help. Those are the signposts. The cardinal directions.”